when you least expect it

Recently, things have been a bit of an uphill climb for me. And since nobody likes a whiner, I have tried to avoid smearing the Internets with my lamentations. I know things will turn around, eventually. That part doesn’t worry me. But there is something I wanted to share with the class.

Have you ever been going through something difficult-a disappointment, a frustration, a dental visit, or being told that you have a ‘great personality’-only to hear from some well-meaning person:”Well, when you least expect it, something great will happen”?

I want so badly, if only for the sake of poetic irony, to punch these people in the face sometimes.

As usual, I can count on the Harry Potter franchise to teach me a valuable life lesson that aligns perfectly with my preexisting bias.

Contrary to popular belief, this is what really happens when  you least expect it:

That’s right. When you least expect it, Lord Voldemort hugs you. After he blows up your school and ruins your life. My point being, I think the flaw in the “when you least expect it” logic is that no one can go around “not expecting” things or”not looking for” things. That just makes you a weird combination of jittery and mopey [which is what I imagine that those alcoholic energy drinks probably do to you].

If understood in a bad light [which I have just taught you all how to do], the “When you least expect it” ideology has the same destructive potential as my other nemesis: “Don’t get your hopes up”.

So, I elect to change the mass-circulated phrase of polite consolation to “It will get better.” Because it’s something I believe, it’s something I know, and it’s something that requires little to no emotional gymnastics.

The Little Engine That Could didn’t Least-Expect to climb the hill. He just kept moving Pirates don’t go Not-Looking for buried treasure. They leave no stone unturned until they find it And I can’t split hairs over what to think about and what to concentrate all my mental energies on not-thinking about. So, I choose to keep going. To hang in there. And to wait for it to get better.

I expect it will.


2 thoughts on “when you least expect it

  1. Beth. I have been going through the exact same thing. My life has been nothing but major disappointments and crushing blows to the junk. The problem is my heart has always had this unrelenting optimism that ”Well, when you least expect it, something great will happen”? This has made things painful for me. I’ve tried to adopt Jamie’s motto of “no hopes, no disappointment” but that seems meaningless. I can’t offer any poetic words to inspire an epiphany or some sea change to the way you feel. I’m still waiting for one myself but I know exactly how you feel being in this situation. I’ve been in it since my first memory.

    ~ Adam aka NickAdamsComedy


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