Here’s Looking at Us


I have started this entry many times. The mountains were big? The hotel was haunted? The pad thai was reasonably priced for the portion size? One of the greatest ironies in the life of a writer is that you spend so much time struggling to attach words and meanings, often in situations where words fail. And here I am grasping straws, herding cats, chasing wind. I am against cruel and unusual punishment, and in this I feel like a hypocrite by attempting to force my ideas into the confines of language.

There is no way to explain being thousands of feet in the air while feeling perfectly centered and grounded. There is no way to explain becoming friends with your family, and family with your friends. There is no way to explain a raspberry lemonade dark chocolate and the things it does to your senses when coupled with a good, strong latte. There is no way to explain what the first hug in years feels like.

Sometimes, you just have to let things fly. Put down the notebook and let your senses take over. That is what the weekend was for me, a weekend of presence. I wasn’t along for the ride, I wasn’t checking things off an itinerary (unless our anti-itinerary counts!) 

I was simply, completely there; simultaneously looking and seeing, touching and feeling, hearing and understanding.

Artists have a concept called negative space. Not an area where you say bad things and air grievances. More like context of your work of art. It is the area that doesn’t appear to be “in use”, but has the important role of putting the focus of the work into perspective.

For me, much of  the beauty of my weekend in Denver was in its negative space. It was what we didn’t do and didn’t say that made the trip. No worry, no schedule, no need to fill silence with words, no sense of preoccupation. No normal restaurant experiences.

To have the distance removed between two people for a while leaves room for the time itself to pass, and for each moment experienced and savored in its entirety. You’re not on the phone, or looking through a chat window. You are face to face with one another. You are giving the adventure your undivided attention. Such was Denver and so will be its memories, colored by laughter and clouds.

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2 thoughts on “Here’s Looking at Us

  1. Beth, you are a beautiful person(inside and out!!); AND so are your words. It was my pleasure reading about your weekend. I’m glad that I was able to expierance it with you in moments so that I too can understand your “emotional language.”
    all my love,
    ammo

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    • Ambs! Reading over your sweet comment made me miss you! I love you and am really happy for you and Tom. Stay in touch- I update this site a lot more regularly nowadays, so it is a more reliable way to be in touch. And Facebook always works! ❤

      Like

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